After date number four, when things began to get serious, it was my sister, ironically, who warned me about having a relationship with a man who was probably still grieving.
But during the following weeks Tim slowly told me about Jane’s diagnosis, her illness, the fight she put up and her preparations for death.
He says he started grieving his loss of her before she even died since she’d been bed-ridden for two years, and he knew he’d be saying goodbye.
I’m nervous about getting involved with him too soon.) So here I am in love with a guy who hasn't even removed his wifes clothes or shoes from the closets. My advise is to stay away from anyone that just lost someone. I have not heard one happy story, Has anyone married and lived a happy life with a recent widower? We are just the buffers to help them get through it. The question is really whether you can handle your jealousy regarding his feelings for his deceased wife since you feel you are competing with her for his affections.I understand people grieve at their own pace and I have never put pressure on him, however. People grieve in different ways, and this man is apparently not yet ready to remove his wife's clothing and shoes from the closet, either because that would be too emotionally painful for him to do, or because it might give him comforting memories to see these things, or both.I made that need known last weekend in a calm, rational way.In your book, you said that if a guy isn’t seeing you more than once a week by the 3 months point, he probably isn’t interested in a serious relationship.